Dear Ninja Fetus, whom I love:
Please stop kicking the hell out of me when I am trying to sleep! I realize that there is no window into your womb to tell you that the sun went to bed and so should you, but dear lord child! Do you have to train for the olympics at 2 AM? If my OBGYN could install a lightswitch to tell you it is sleepytime...I would. So here's the deal. I'm gonna poke the shit out of you all day to keep you awake so you sleep well tonight. Mommy can be annoying too....